Tug-of-war

There are times in ones life where one is at the receiving end of hostility from another person whom he is a friend to and turns for support, even i have intentionally put people at that end for heir own good, but rarely it is when you come to know the reason of this behaiviour towards you which seems to be that it is deemed as either not to trouble you with things or emotionally detaching u frm them for it would only invite trouble. And it does hurt, like a thousand pincers that you can do nothing absolutely nothing about the situation except to hang on to probably a false hope as to that person would reconcile. As a person who has put many people through the acid test it does seem many dont even survive barring a few who do. But even in those times i have tend to put the intentions behind the facade of being the hostile person to detach people from myself so that they have one less person to care about…but when the person at the receiving end comes to know of the more of the onli half that he is shown, all hell breaks lose for the person who is at the other end. Its like if there are two friends and one is about to die he will make sure that his friend wouldnt remember him after his death but hell breaks lose when that person’s friend comes to know the reason of the strange behaiviour of his friend. The person who has put the other one at the hostile receiving end just because his own life is a mess, as a person who has gone through all this, i can say we are probably no matter how strong we are or pretend to be that we are, we are sort of a bit afraid that someone can stand beside us caring for our troubles as his own for no rhyme or reason. The fear isnt baseless since one does feel what would happened if that person is gone after knowing the reason behind that hostility, or one questions why is this person so kind towards me, though as much as we need that person as a support we tend to be overcomed by our fear which leads to complex situations of other person feeling that you think that this relationship has turned into a burden rather than support which that person is ready to provide at any time. However as i said in my previous post of Need that we all need someone  in our rough patches of life to put our head on and cry our heart out coz we are designed for anything but loneliness…but in those times to people putting others at the hostile end it does become their responsibity as to realize that there are people who can care solely about you at whatever time you need them without any rhyme or reason just because they earned a friend in you and believe in u. One should rather not be dellusioned by the troubles and learn to trust the person at the other end who’s ever extended hand you refuse to take just because of the reason that you believe that you do not want to bother them with your troubles of a messy life…being the person at the receiving end i do know that it is an acid test but as i learned from someone who had his hand extended all the time for me that all you have to do is cling on and have the hope that the person will come around looking for your exteneded hand to just squeeze and cry out all his troubles with that all u have to do is keep it extended with or without any hope just because of a simple reason that you consider that person your friend.

But…

but then again the person who has his hand extended shouldn’t be disappointed at any time of his life that, that person didnt come around for this wasnt a prerequisite you kept for that person before considering him a friend. You should do things without expecting anything in return, be it the return of that person, in this world you won’t find many takers now for such thoughts and you would end up being scarred for the rest of your life thats why do have your hopes, but not great expectations. For if you do end up getting scarred, there is no way, no matter how much you want, you have to move on…

Just that then you’ll stop learning to trust someone just because of one or few people just like the person putting you at the receiving end probably has and the tug-of-war can probably only be stopped by sitting down calmly and talking , crying and screaming out your troubles and problems to each other